With apologies in advance to Mel Brooks:
I'm tired.
Tired of playing the game.
Ain't it a friggin' shame?
I'm so tired.
...But I don't wanna get fired.
Can't you see I'm pooped?
How tired am I of my job? Let me count the ways....
* I'm tired of all my co-workers who don't pull their own weight ... then make me feel guilty when I complain about it.
* I'm tired of doing all the work my co-workers leave for me because they're "too busy."
* I'm tired of all the people who bitch about gas prices, when they know I can't control them.
* I'm tired of all the people who rush the door at 2 minutes to midnight to buy massive quantities of scratch tickets or beer or gas -- and pay for all of it in change.
* I'm tired of all the people who make a $2 purchase and pay for it with a $100 bill ... and then get upset when I don't IMMEDIATELY have change for them. I'm not a bank.
* I'm tired of all the people who want their big bills broken. I'm not a bank.
* I'm tired of all the people who ask me a question and then talk over the top of my answer.
* I'm tired of all the people who interrupt me -- for whatever reason. It's rude as hell. I've even started doing it myself.
* I'm tired of all the people in a hurry who slide their debit cards before they've even told me what they want.
* I'm tired of all the people who complain when their credit or debit cards get declined ... even though anybody who uses their card knows WAY more about how much money they've got in their account than I do.
* I'm tired of drunks.
* I'm tired of drunks trying to cheer me up when I'm having a Bad Night.
* I'm tired of having Bad Nights.
* I'm tired of drunk women telling me I'm sexy -- when they normally wouldn't talk to me any other time.
* I'm tired of drunks and druggies and homeless people taking pity on me when I'm stressed out.
* I'm tired of people begging for money, for enough spare change to buy beer, for enough gas money to get home, offering to pay me back tomorrow or leave their car title with me to prove they'll come back. If you're that broke, why are you out driving?
* I'm tired of people asking if I've ever been held-up. If I'd been held up, I probably wouldn't do this anymore.
* I'm tired of people yelling, screaming, for no good reason, just because they think nobody will call them on it.
* I'm tired of out-of-control people. There are a LOT of them out there these days. People with no boundaries, who want to share their crisis with EVERYONE. Sometimes I think I'm becoming one of them.
* I'm tired of people skulking around, always being up to something, always trying to see how much they can get away with. Even if the economy wasn't in the toilet, there'd be a lot of lowlifes running around.
* I'm tired of everybody wanting something for free, WANTING A BARGAIN, wanting to barter: "I can get this cheaper down the road." So, go there. There's the price, pay it or leave.
* I'm tired of people who park in the parking lot for an hour -- or 2, or 3 -- and then leave. What are they doing out there? Making a drug deal? Gabbing endlessly on their cell phones? Thinking over whether it's worth it to hold me up? It's not. Get outta here, ya make me nervous. Go home.
* I'm tired of people trashing the restroom and not cleaning up after themselves. What the hell are they like at home?
* I'm tired of people who can't put down their cell phone long enough to complete a transaction -- or even tell me what they want.
* I'm tired of the drivers whose cars blow through the parking lot at 30 or 40 miles per hour EVERY DAY. It's a fucking GAS STATION, morons!
* I'm tired of the endless churning hurry, the rush to be somewhere, always running late -- it never stops. No wonder there are so many car wrecks. No wonder so many people are so stressed-out. It's sure as hell not just me.
* I'm tired of all the bullshit.
* I'm tired of complaints -- customers', mine, anyone's.
What does that leave? Well, not much. At least they're still paying me....
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